REVISE THE PAPER THAT IS ATTACHED BELOW

From AnferneeCoale

To Zachary Alexander

Cc

Sent Friday, February 7, 2020 8:38 PM

Subject Rough Draft

Critical analysis History

Topic 1

The age of exploration

1.
       

http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/historic_figures/cortes_hernan.shtml

2.
       

https://www.biography.com/explorer/jacques-cousteau

3.
       

https://www.encyclopediavirginia.org/Exploration_The_Age_of

The era in between 1500-1800 was full of the stories of the people who have played their part in making America which (change to the word what) it is today now (delete this word)
. As in the early start of the 17th century (wrong century)
, Christopher Columbus was the one who started the exploration in the world (
sentence wording and grammar issues)
, through which the new world came into order. Through that time, there happened many of the plights in the new nation on the map of the world(
sentence wording and grammar issues),. Like from 1492-1650, the biological exchanges between the immigrants in the America and the local results(
wording issues
/revise
) in the deaths of the 95% of the native’s habitats of the land. Thus, the English have started to move into America, making the areas of the country into their colonies. The British settlement was in the result of the truce with the Spanish(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence
).

Like, Cortés was the first Spanish who made the colony in America(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence
).

The expedition has been the part of the history of the world which had urged the nation to send their people on the expeditions, through which more areas were to be explored(
sentence wording and grammar issues).

(delete this information as it does not fit the topic or time period.) Like, Sir Ernest Henry Shackleton in 1901, was sent to explore the Antarctic by the British. If history is to be seen regarding the people who have been involved in the expedition, there are (
wording issues
/revise
)
numbers of the people who have earned their name in the history of the world through the expedition (change to: their expeditions). Their expedition (make plural) has shaped today’s world,(end sentence here and deleted highlighted words) specifically, the new world, USA. The expedition of the European (wording issues) was the one factor that explored the new world for us, and later the native states of the USA, have sought independence from the last colonist, British, through expression their grievances from the King George.

Topic 2

The scientific revolution

• https://www.sparknotes.com/history/european/scientificrevolution/
• http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/historic_figures/galilei_galileo.shtml
• https://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/features/OrbitsHistory
• https://www.biography.com/scientist/isaac-newton

The scientific revolution (capitalize both words) was the part of the ancient people’s (change to the word researchers’
) interest in exploring the secrets of the world, that had led to the emerging of the new scientific techniques. Like, in the history of the world, Issac newton(capitalize) has a prominent in the introduction of the law of the Physics(
sentence wording and grammar issues, because of which he was awarded by the then Queen of England. He was the scientist of the mid-17th century. At that time, the science was not the proper subject, rather it was the interest of the people who were taking part in defining the different things.
(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence
) Another name that came front in the line of the scientist was Galileo, who was the Italian scientist, that is well renowned because of his experiment on Gravity through the Tower of Pisa.

(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence
)That experiment of the Galileo had refuted the theory of the gravitation of Aristotle.

And other contribution of his towards the scientific the revolution(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/also: capitalize the words Scientific Revolution and delete
the
in between the two words
) was the publishing of the Law of motion (capitalize the word Motion) and the principles of the mechanics. The industrial revolution (capitalize both words)
was not carried by the scientist of any single country or state, rather it was contributed by the many intellectuals in the past who put great efforts in the reformation of the scientific knowledge.

And the technological advancement in the world, which has been witnessed in the starting of the 20th century was also the fruit of ancient efforts. The scientific exploration was not limited to physics or mechanics, rather it was also about astronomy as well. (
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence

)Like, the planetary motion was also defined by Aristotle. Who explained the studies and the motion of the physical world? The religion also played its part in the expansion of scientific knowledge(
sentence wording and grammar issues
/incomplete sentence
).